Laying Down Stones: Pointing to Jesus

About five years ago my family went to Utah for our Spring Break. It was breathtakingly fantastic! My husband's Aunt Judy lived there and she knew of the most amazing places to take us. We saw hieroglyphs, Ancient Anasazi Indian ruins, and some of the most spectacular red rock formations.  She was a wonderful tour guide and my family enjoyed our trip tremendously. 

If you have been to these places, then you know that a person must hike to get to any of them. I'm from South Texas and had never "officially" hiked. Sure I've trekked the flat land of the Gulf Coast, but we were going up and down huge rocks that had no official path, nothing to hold on to, and a very steep drop off. 

There is something you may need to know about me at this point... I am not very graceful or balanced and I am terrified of heights! Did I mention that we hiked UP? Once we went up, we hiked back DOWN? Did you know that there are edges that a person can fall off of? While the view was breathtaking, I had no confidence that I wouldn't plunge to my death with one false step! 

Aunt Judy was an experienced hiker though, and pointed out these odd stacks of stones. I had noticed them before but had no idea what their purpose was...if any.

She told me that the stacked rocks where cairns and they were along a trail within sight of each other to let you know you're on the right track. Follow the cairns and you will be okay. If you veer away from them, that is when you can be in trouble.

Then to make me connect with the cairn, we each added a stone to the pile.

As I look back on that time, I am reminded that in the Old Testament God told people to stack stones.

"When all the people had crossed the Jordan, the Lord said to Joshua,“Now choose twelve men, one from each tribe. Tell them, ‘Take twelve stones from the very place where the priests are standing in the middle of the Jordan. Carry them out and pile them up at the place where you will camp tonight.’”, (Joshua 4: 1-3, NLT)

God had just performed the humanly impossible act of drying up a full and actively flowing river so the multitude of Israelites could cross over to the promised land on dry soil. He tells them to stack the stones in honor of the miracles He has done for them. 

These stacked stones would serve as a reminder of God's ability and willingness to deliver His people from impossible circumstances.

In this 31 day series of Laying Down Our Stones, we are referring to stones as wounds, hurts, offenses, and disappointments that we are hanging on to.

If you are carrying stones from past experiences, or from present circumstances and it seems impossible to be free from the burden of them...I have good news! God is in the business of doing the impossible!

He wants you to stack your stones at His feet and release them to Him. Allow Him to use those stones that once represented pain and hopelessness to be a beacon reminding you of how powerful He is and how willing He is to perform the impossible in your life. 

"He heals the brokenhearted and bandages their wounds.", (Psalm 147:3, NLT)

Just like a person with a broken arm must submit to the physician for his arm to be healed correctly, we must submit our broken hearts to God, the healer of broken hearts. How do we submit to Him? By laying down the stones that slow us down, and by trusting God with our painful parts.

"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.", (Hebrews 12:1-2, NLT)

God, being a loving Father, always thinks of the big picture. In the Joshua 4 scripture above, He commanded that they stack the stones as a reminder of the miracles they had personally witnessed and experienced.

As you see God bring healing to the areas you release to Him, those markers (cairns) will become your reminder of God's miracle workings in your life... but it doesn't stop there! Your steps of faith, obedience, and trust will affect future generations.

"Then Joshua said to the Israelites, “In the future your children will ask, ‘What do these stones mean?’  Then you can tell them, ‘This is where the Israelites crossed the Jordan on dry ground.’ For the Lord your God dried up the river right before your eyes, and he kept it dry until you were all across, just as he did at the Red Sea[c] when he dried it up until we had all crossed over. He did this so all the nations of the earth might know that the Lord’s hand is powerful, and so you might fear the Lord your God forever.” (Joshua 4:21-24, NLT)

There are always people watching to see how we will live out our faith. As a parent, our children are our most diligent observers. When we lay down our stones of pain and offense, we are showing our children how to trust Jesus with their own stones.

Believing with you today that we each have the courage to lay more stones at His feet.

Dear Lord, Help me remember the miracles you have worked in my life in the past. Open my heart to use those as encouragement to trust you with more. I trust you with my wounds today and ask you to reveal yourself to me as healer of my broken heart. As I learn to lay my stones down, let my faith and trust in you be a marker showing my children the way to you. In Jesus name I pray~ Amen 

Throwing Stones:Wounding Marriages

I've been married to my husband James for almost 18 years. Even though we still have issues and problems, for the most part we have a wonderful relationship. Sadly, I can't say that it has always been that way. 

When  I got married, I didn't delude myself by thinking that it was all going to be butterflies and roses. I knew we would face tough times. I knew there would be times I didn't like him and other times when he didn't like me. What I didn't expect was for us to hate  (yes I said the 'H' word) one another at the same time and for that mutual hate to last for over a year. Life in my house was not fun!

We came into our marriage with our own sets of baggage. (Not the kind that brings back fond memories of grand adventures) We were each broken and wounded, looking to the other to mend those painful places. That expectation only led to more brokenness and wounds.

I wanted him to make me feel loved and important. He wanted me to make Him feel respected and honored. My way of "earning" his love and being important was to bend over backwards to make sure the house was perfect, the kids were polished, and hot food was on the table. His way of "earning" my respect and honor was to bury himself in his job and make as much money as possible.

At the end of the day, we were both exhausted and no closer to having our desires met. We began to resent one another. 

We kept score and quickly had a laundry list of:

• ways that the other had let us down
•  stinging words they said
• ways they didn't live up to their role of healing those broken places.  

Each wound, disappointment, or offense was like a stone we picked up. It was jagged and cutting and added to the wounds we already carried. Over time we used those stones to build walls to protect our fragile hearts. Unfortunately we didn't recognize that building walls only exasperated the isolation we each already felt in our marriage.

We groomed our walls well with the stones we gathered, but there were special ones we kept in reserve. 

These special stones were handled with care because they represented the biggest hurts and disappointments of all. They, after all, were proof that he didn't love me or that I didn't respect him. They represented wounds that cut the deepest and we each clung to our own collection of these "treasures".

We found ways to live "okay" with our walls and our wounds. We had happy kids, a clean house, and a balanced bank account; we didn't have joy, peace, or butterflies. 

We weren't aware of it at the time,but those "special stones" became part of our personal arsenal. We wouldn't plan it (at least I don't think we did), but we would be going right along doing "okay" when BOOM! Out of no where an opportunity was seized and one of those stones were levied at the other person. It always happened when the receiving person had allowed themselves to become vulnerable. (After all, what good is an attack if there is no chance of doing damage?) 

Since the attacked person was in a vulnerable state, the stone may as well have been an emotional nuclear war head. Many times the wounded person could do nothing at the moment but run and cower, using what little energies they had left to repair and reinforce their wall.

I was as guilty as James was of this "Nuclear Sabotage". I can't explain it. I wouldn't be looking  for an opportunity to level him, but something in me sensed when he was vulnerable. Instead of taking that opportunity to try to connect, my instinct and reaction was to declare war. We kept score even in these assaults. The problem is that there comes a time when someone has nothing left to fight with.

My day came and I threw in the white flag. I surrendered. I was done. 

We were "good". We still had our walls, and our arsenals, but it was a season of cease fire. As we drove down the road, out of no where James threw a boulder from a wound I had caused him years before. At a different time, I would have forged a counter attack. This day I didn't have it in me.

I had begun rebuilding my relationship with God, and I had contributed our current cease fire as God possibly working in our marriage. I knew He was working in me, and hoped James would be able to see it.

That day... in that moment...with that attack... I was shaken to my core. It wasn't about getting even. It wasn't even about my pain. Instantly it was about love. It hurt the deepest I had ever hurt, but it was love.

I loved him so much, that if he truly believed I was the type of woman and wife his attack suggested, then I was the wrong wife for him. He deserved better. I didn't see myself as those terrible things, but if that was who he saw me as being, for his sake I would let him go. 

I didn't attack back. I didn't inflict my wounds on him. I didn't get defensive. I loved him enough to allow him to walk away. I didn't want a divorce. I wasn't looking for a reason to justify a divorce. I wasn't laying a foundation to be able to present myself as a victim of his during or after a divorce. I loved him and wanted him to have a good wife. If that couldn't happen with me, I still wanted that for him.

"Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.". (1 Peter 4:8, NLT)

For the first time this scripture made sense to me. I saw the love God had for me in a new light. I recognized that I had treated my relationship with God much the same as I had the relationship with my husband. I kept score of all the times I felt he let me down. 

I levied stones of accusations against Him yet He never fought back. Instead, God had always countered my attacks with love. 

What I felt towards my husband in that moment was only a small glimpse of what God feels towards us daily. With this realization, something amazing happened...I FELT LOVED! Not by my husband, but by the one who created me. I didn't have to be on guard or defensive...I was loved. That love helped me lay down my stones.


The most bizarre thing happened when I responded to my husband with love...he lost his desire to fight. He realized he didn't believe the things he had assaulted me with. He was just following the pattern of attack that we had established early on in our marriage. Truth be told, this pattern was probably established long before we met. 

This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife and the two are united into one.’ Since they are no longer two but one,” , (Mark 10:8-9, NLT) 

Society often says that marriage is 50/50 or that a person's spouse is their other half. This simply isn't true. Marriage is 100/100. A spouse isn't your other half because the Lord makes you one with them. This means your spouse becomes your whole.

Once we gain that truth, we are able to recognize that the stones we levee at our spouse hit us as well. It is no longer you or me, but WE. Are you ready to lay down your stones and discard your arsenal? Are you ready to love?

All images courtesy of Pixabay

Father God, I ask you to help us recognize the arsenals we have built up in our marriages. Give us the courage to lay those weapons at your feet. Help us know how to show deep love to our spouses. As we gain a concept of what deep love actually is, we ask you to heal the wounds of our heart so we are free to love more deeply. We choose to lay our stones down. Help us to not pick them back up. In Jesus' name we pray ~Amen

Collecting Stones of Offense #write31days

Laying Our Stones Down: #write31days Day 1

When my children were little, they collected stones. They loved the big, shiny, and jagged as much as the small, smooth, and dull. Everywhere we went, whether a weekly trek to the local library or a special vacation to Disney World, they would come home with pockets and hands full of rocks. I can’t count how many I recovered from the washer, heard clanging in the dryer, and worked to dislodge from the vacuum.

We gathered so many rocks and stones, that instead of planting flowers, we decided to create a rock garden. This gave my children a place to put their treasures without them causing damage to the machines on our home.

As they have gotten older, their desire to pick up random stones has lessened. They still come home with a special one every now and then, and they cling to it. These special ones are not released to the rock garden, but are displayed on shelves in bedrooms. Unlike the many they gathered as small children, these stones have their own story behind them. The girls can tell you exactly where they picked each one up, what was going on at the time, as well as why that one was chosen over another one.

Recently I recognize that my daughters are not the only stone hoarders in my home. I have my own collection of stones that I simply wasn’t aware of.

I’m not talking about the random ones you can pick up from a parking lot and place around a tree for a rock garden. The stones I am talking about are stones of offense.

Someone does or says something to us or about us, and instead of forgiving; we pick up that stone and hold on to it. We use it to keep score on how many times the assaulting person has wounded us. We keep it in a place of honor and can recite painful details of the moment we picked it up.

The problem is that the more stones we pick up, the heavier our burden becomes. We become weighted down holding on to these “painful treasures” and they begin to affect other parts of our lives. I know this can't be God's plan for us to be burdened this way.

Image courtesy of Pixabay

"Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.”, (Matthew 11:28-30, NLT)

I encourage you to join me as we walk through the next 30 days learning to leave our weariness and burdens at the feet of Jesus. 

Dear Lord, I recognize that I have picked up a few stones and over time, I sense myself becoming weary from carrying them. Help me release the stones and each wound they represent. Help me truly forgive my offenders and walk in your freedom. I thank you for this, In Jesus' name ~ Amen

Anchoring to Hope During Seasons of Change

I… Don’t…Like…Change! 

image provided by Pixabay.com

I’m not comfortable with it and I am easily plagued by anxiety when things don’t go the way I expect them to. During seasons of change I oftentimes find myself at the crossroads of Hope and Despair.

Lately the hounds of anxiety have been nipping at my heels because the winds of change have been howling. My neighbor across the street moved away. I had no idea the comfort it brought me to see her car parked in the drive. It’s not like we hung out a lot, but it was familiar. We’d say “Hi” to each other in our comings and goings. Her sweet little boy was always eager with a smile and a sweaty boy hug for me. Now I walk outside and am greeted by a “For Rent" sign.

Another change has been the health of my father. He was the first man who owned my heart. He’s always been very strong and capable. Over the past few years his health has declined and it hurts my heart to see him struggle for each breath and have no energy. What hurts most is how his poor health has assaulted his manhood. The physical limitations he faces cause him to feel useless, and I am unable to fix that for him.

Aside from these personal changes, the social climate shift happening in our country causes me to grasp for an anchor of hope during this season of change.

Maybe I've lived in a bubble, but I have always found comfort in the belief that if a person worked hard and made good choices, he or she would be rewarded and have good things happen to them and for them. On the flip side, if a person was lazy and made poor choices they would earn and suffer hardships and difficulties.

Personal Convictions

Recently my sweet, comfortable bubble has burst. Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. People who break the law get road ways named after them, while a hard working person exercising their right to deny services that conflict with their personal belief, is put out of business because of court mandated fines and penalties.

Life

A police officer, doing his duty to protect and serve, is brutally murdered leaving behind a wife and two young children, while a known criminal posts videos calling for “open season on white people and cops.”

                                                          Respect

The tragedy of a young man (criminal or otherwise) being shot and killed by police became permission for an entire community to go on several rampages of rioting, looting and destroying businesses and personal property that other people in their community had worked and labored to build. The hard working people had to pick up the pieces, while the rioters walked off with their merchandise and burned their businesses down. It was Christmas day for the rioters and a disaster for the people who were trying to do the right thing.

Marriage

I believe the definition of marriage can only include one man and one woman. It is a fundamental truth of my faith. Now it is legal for same sex couples to marry.

Gender Distinction

Businesses, schools, Governments, and individuals are moving towards a gender-neutral approach of interaction and communication. It is becoming unacceptable to identify a person as male or female.  

"But ‘God made them male and female’ from the beginning of creation." (Mark 10:6, NLT).

This change has led to a boy, who identifies himself a girl, fighting for the right to share a girl’s locker room. This rips at all I known as normal, right, and acceptable.

 Safety

There are movements proclaiming “Black Lives Matter” or “Police Lives Matter”. It insinuates that life outside that chosen group doesn’t matter. Can’t I believe that ALL lives matter and no one should be murdered?

““You must not murder.” (Deuteronomy 5:17, NLT).

All Lives Matter

It makes sense to me that if we were to embrace the standard that no one should be murdered, the problem would be resolved. 

And in keeping with the idea that ALL lives matter and no one should be murdered, we would need to stop killing those who are being murdered inside the womb whose remains being sold for profit.  

ALL lives matter because Jesus gave his life for ALL to have the opportunity to believe and follow Him.

"Jesus gave his life for our sins, just as God our Father planned, in order to rescue us from this evil world in which we live.". (Galatians 1:4, NLT).

He didn’t die for one group or another. He gave His life so everyone could have a relationship with Him. We can ALL have hope through Him. ALL lives are equally valuable to Him, so they ALL need to be equally valuable to each of us.

Good Considered Evil/ Evil Considered Good

As the above changes unfolded,  I hoped and prayed for things to go back to comfortable. I wanted things to make sense again. 

The values and behavior that have always been considered right and good are being rejected and considered bad. Behavior and actions that have been considered unacceptable and evil in the past are now enthusiastically embraced as good. This behavior and social shift reminds me of a verse:

"What sorrow for those who say that evil is good and good is evil,that dark is light and light is dark, that bitter is sweet and sweet is bitter.". (Isaiah 5:20, NLT).

Anchoring To Hope Instead of Sinking into Despair

As I watch evil being embraced as good and good being rejected as evil, those hounds of anxiety threaten to rip me apart…but I am comforted by truths that will stand no matter how much society changes.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart;do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.". (Proverbs 3:5-6, NLT).

This is both a command and a promise. As I cling to core beliefs that society wants to reject and tear apart, I don’t have to understand what is happening or why. All I have to do is trust God. When I don’t know what to do in the midst of these changes, I submit to Him and He will guide me. That gives me peace.

Ecclesiastes 3 explains that there is a season and a time for everything. The beautiful part is each season has its counterpart. A time to be born leads to a time to die. A time to sow leads to a time to reap. A time of war changes into a time for peace. This model of balance presented in scripture comforts me. While I can’t endorse or understand the changes I see, I know it is a season. I know this season of wickedness prevailing will end. I know that God has victory over all wickedness and shares that victory with his children. He is the hero of this story!

Things That Will Never Change

Change is an unavoidable part of life. Neighbors move, parents die, society as we know it falls apart. It can be unnerving to a person who isn’t comfortable with change. Fortunately there are things that will never change that keep us grounded as the world as we know it seems to disappear.

God doesn’t change.

"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.". (Hebrews 13:8, NLT).

God doesn’t lie. God doesn’t change His mind. God is not idle. God does not renege on His promises.

"God is not a man, so he does not lie. He is not human, so he does not change his mind. Has he ever spoken and failed to act? Has he ever promised and not carried it through?".(Numbers 23:19, NLT). 

 “People are like grass; their beauty is like a flower in the field. The grass withers and the flower fades. But the word of the Lord remains forever." And that word is the Good News that was preached to you.". (1 Peter 1:24-25, NLT).

The certainty of my Salvation in Jesus Christ will never change.

"21 Through Christ you have come to trust in God. And you have placed your faith and hope in God because he raised Christ from the dead and gave him great glory.22 You were cleansed from your sins when you obeyed the truth, so now you must show sincere love to each other as brothers and sisters. Love each other deeply with all your heart. 23 For you have been born again, but not to a life that will quickly end. Your new life will last forever because it comes from the eternal, living word of God.". (1 Peter 1:21-23, NLT).

• He doesn’t change
• He doesn’t lie
• He fulfills all His promises
• His word doesn’t change
• I have put my trust in Him and my salvation is secured (this can only happen if you have trusted Jesus as your savior and asked Him to be your Lord. For more information on this, please click "How can I be saved?"

…these truths are all I need to keep anxiety and fear at bay.

"But when I am afraid, I will put my trust in you.". (Psalm 56:3, NLT)

I am a child of God and He loves me with an eternal love. That will not change. People may attempt to change and manipulate truths about gender, marriage, and general human courtesy and decency, but the biblical truths will stand whether society wants them to or not. 

The world around me may change, but the things that truly matter will stand forever…and with that I can walk in peace as I practice anchoring to hope during seasons of change.

If you have read this and are interested in knowing more about anchoring to the hope that comes from Jesus through salvation, click "How can I be saved".

I must FIND My Daughter!

“Mom, did you see me?” That is the question that both thrills and strikes fear in my heart.

In a sea of 350 band and color guard teenagers, I eagerly scan each one in an attempt to identify which one belongs to me. To a person who doesn’t know my daughter, it easily would be a hopeless and futile search. Everyone is dressed the same and there is constant movement making it impossible to identify one specific person in the herd… or is it?

I know my daughter. Her gate...her stance…the flip of her pony tail. It may take me a little bit, but I will be able to identify her in that enormous crowd of eager performers. There are times when anxiety rises; when it takes a little longer to locate her in the crowd. Fear grips my heart as I know I will have to answer the question…”Mom, did you see me?” 

Complete elation washes over me as I spot her little pony tail flip. I FOUND HER! My current episode of “Where’s Kenzie” (our twist on Where’s Waldo) has come to an end…I sought her and I found her.

My heart shifts to the Lord and my pursuit of Him. I’m reminded of Jeremiah 29:13 You will seek me and find me when you seek me with your whole heart.

In today’s society it can be difficult to find God in the sea of details of our lives. There are many distractions that can cause Him to seem lost to us and elusive. It can seem as if He is hiding in the scurry of movement and activities.

As my daughter performs on the football field there are many things that can catch my eye and distract me…but I assure you I continue to search for her with my whole heart…and I find her. I don’t let the flurry of activity distract me from my goal…finding the one who makes my heart leap.

In the same way, we are to search for the Lord: Eagerly, without distraction, and with a sense of urgency. There is a chance that I can search for my daughter during a performance and miss her. Jeremiah 29:13 promises us that any time we seek God with our whole heart…we will find Him.

It would break my heart to have to tell Kenzie that I didn’t find her on the field during her performance. It would be even more heartbreaking to say I didn’t find God.

I encourage you to seek Him…anchor your search to the promise of Jeremiah 29:13. Seek Him with your whole heart and you will find Him!

Today I am Linking up with the Five Minute Friday group on the topic of FIND.

When will I learn?

Do you remember the child’s toy where you would put the matching peg into the matching hole? Did you ever try to force that square peg into the round hole? As a child, this toy taught us the hard way that things have to match up to me successful.

I realized recently that I am still playing that game in my life. I have a round hole (a period of time) and someone offers me a square peg (an area of commitment). I will eagerly accept the peg without even thinking. Then the process of me pounding those parts into submission begins. I become consumed and neglect other things because “I MUST MAKE THIS FIT!”

The reality is that there is nothing enjoyable or pleasing about that experience. A further reality is that many times the end result is not good, and I am left exhausted and overwhelmed. (Can I get an AMEN?)

Commitments are not always this way though…there are times when the peg offered me is round and smooth. It easily fits into my round hole with little effort and it becomes something worthy to take joy in. I am left with a sense of accomplishment and I can say that I did a good job; those times are life giving and invigorating.

What can I learn from this? I can go back to basics and recognize that the spot I have available is round. When I have a peg (opportunity to commit to something) I need to pause to examine if it is a match for the slot I have available. If so, I know it has the opportunity to be a great experience. If not, it is most definitely a recipe for disaster. It can end up red faced, overwhelmed, and dripping tears because I just can’t make it fit…NO MATTER HOW HARD I TRY!

The good news is that if my hole is round and a square peg needs a place to be, another sweet friend may very well have a square hole in her life that that peg is perfect for. 

Wouldn’t it be funny if my stressed out, overwhelmed sister had the round peg and I had her square one? Can you imagine how much nicer things would be if we slowed down and took time to see if it fit BEFORE trying to force it? I think I may be able to learn this lesson. 

BTW- I’ll trade you a square peg for a round one!

This post is a linkup with the Five Minute Friday group. The topic for today is LEARN

I am a FAILURE...or not?

What is a finish line?

This is the question I have had to ask myself so many times over the past seven weeks. I was graciously accepted into a 7 week challenge by Sara, the coordinator and faithful cheerleader at www.faithfulfinishlines.com . All I had to do was participate in their program (which is amazing by the way) and blog once a week about what was going on with me and the finish line goal I set for myself. It should have been fairly easy, especially since all I really had to do was talk about me…right?

Turns out it wasn't so easy. I promise I have 6 other partially written posts about what I was going through during this difficult seven weeks of my life. It was a journey of post-surgery pain, humbling limitations, and slowly learning to celebrate the small stuff. I will post them eventually, but it is the end of the challenge, and time dictates this one must come first.

You see, I am a big picture thinker and set big goals. I strive for big things and have always been very capable of taking care of myself and the entire world around me very effectively. Then suddenly I find myself post-surgery  and the very capable person I have always been suddenly wasn't there. 

In planning the surgery, I knew I would be limited on some physical things, and had planned to fulfill my faithful finish lines commitment with ease as well as focus on things that I had been putting off because I had been too 'on the go' and wouldn't slow down and focus on them. One of those things I had planned to do was write another book. (Didn’t I say I thought and planned BIG things?)

The day I went in for surgery I had it all planned out! The night of surgery when the nerve block wore off, I recognized I may have a problem. I counted and planned on a lack of use of my arm…I figured I could deal with that even in writing since there are speech to text programs. What I hadn't counted on was the pain. Not just a stub your toe pain that you can hold your breath and get through, but a deep pain that causes you to not be able to think straight. It's a pain that doesn't seem to release or go away. 

Then there was the added emotional pain that comes when you realize that you (a very capable person) can’t do the basic hygiene tasks of brushing your teeth, brushing your hair, applying deodorant, changing clothes, or bathing.  My husband bought me baby wipes and I wept when I realized I couldn't even do that on my own.

I also faced the realization that I couldn't sleep in my bed. I have always been a slide or belly sleeper and was reduced to attempting sleep sitting up in a recliner. All of the things above, with a lack or good rest, relying on my dear husband to tend to me as if I were a fragile toddler, allowed an all too familiar voice get louder and louder. This is a voice I have heard so many times throughout my life. It always says the same exact thing… YOU ARE A FAILURE!

It was different this time though. There was another voice trying to pierce the darkness. This voice told me, “Hang in there!”, “You are loved”, “It’s okay for your goal to be survival”. 

This voice was loving, and merciful. It told me that it was okay to show myself mercy and grace. It helped me see that small goals can be good goals. It told be to recognize my limitations and embrace life within those limits...this voice spoke to me with the mercy that God shows us, not the condemnation that comes from the enemy.

I started this journey seven weeks ago with a goal of writing a book, not gaining weight during my post-surgery time, and getting myself back to walking 3 miles a day 3 times a week. I even wanted to finish off with my first official 5K run.

At the end of this 7 weeks, and have only successfully written one blog post (this makes two),  I gained 15 pounds, and I walked 2 miles in the mall once between doctor appointments. According to this, I could listen to that familiar voice and agree that I am a failure. OR….

I could tap in to what the Faithful Finish Lines community is all about… MERCY AND GRACE.  I have survived the most physically painful experience of my life. I haven’t given up, but pushed through physical therapy that I actively wept through (and still do). I am committed to do my exercises and stretches at home that I still weep through twice a day. I can now bathe myself and brush my teeth…all with pain, but I can do it. I am a winner. I am successful. What are finish lines and goals all about anyway? They are about not giving up. I wanted to give up so many times, but I haven’t. Sara and the Faithful Finish Lines team didn't give up on me and helped me learn how to not give up on myself, and for that I am grateful!

So dear friend, if you are in a season of life right now where the main voice you hear is condemning and telling you that you are a failure…I want to introduce you to another voice. It’s one I just met, but it’s an amazing one to have in your head and on your side!  This voice says, “Hang in there!”, “You are loved”, “It’s okay for your goal to be survival”. This voice is loving, and merciful. It tells you that it is okay to show yourself mercy and grace. It will help you see that small goals can be good goals. It will teach you  to recognize your limitations and embrace life within those limits. It will tell you that you are not alone!

I have no medal or badge to celebrate a big momentous accomplishment, but I survived and I can do the little things…and that is a pretty big thing!

When Life Provides the Excuse...

Here we are at the beginning of the year and I, just like many others, want to commit to a healthier lifestyle. You know the drill...move more and eat healthier. I really want to make this same commitment this year, but life is giving me my excuse to quit even before I have a chance to begin.

In four hours I will be having surgery to correct an injured shoulder. From what I gather, it is a painful recovery that will keep my arm completely immobilized for 6-8 weeks. TA-DA! My automatic get off the hook card. Truthfully, how can I be expected to make good food choices, if I can't cook or even shop for groceries? Is it even a good idea for a person with a lame and immobilized arm to attempt to exercise?

My heart's desire is to get healthy...especially since I was on a five day cruise over New Years and my waist-line reflects the endless supply of amazing food. How can I push through the MOUNTAIN of logical and socially acceptable excuses that are conveniently placed in my lap? On my own, I truly don't know that I can. Fortunately God laid an option (or opportunity) right beside the excuse...and I had a choice to make.

The option/ opportunity was from an organization, Faithful Finish Lines. They were offering a free 7 week membership to bloggers who would participate in the program for free in exchange for a blog post once a week sharing their experiences as they participate. Surprisingly, I was one of only ten bloggers accepted. I truthfully had no thought that I would be one of the chosen ten...but here I am presenting my first blog post as I take the first step in this seven week adventure.

I am not always the best at keeping my commitments to myself, but since I know I was blessed with a coveted slot, I know I can be committed to this. I am excited about the journey and growing my character to chart my own course with God's help as opposed to embracing and using the excuses that life lays at my feet. I am Shifting my Vision and recognizing that even post surgery, I can move towards my personal "Finish Line" instead of spending seven weeks soaking in convenient excuses!

Managing grief during the holidays: receiving the gift of HOPE

Take a sneak peek and maybe find a source of hope for yourself or someone you love! This course is video based and work at your own pace, on your own time, and in your own location...It can be accessed from any device at any time so you are not tethered to the computer. You have lifetime access to it and all updates that are added. Gift yourself or someone you love with HOPE for the holidays!

Follow the link below to see the first video of the course...

http://ude.my/diwsk

If you decide to purchase...use coupon vid3promo 
to receive 50% off! (this promotion is for a limited time)


If you want it for yourself or to gift...use the following coupon code to save 50%
vid3promo

Getting to know Me Podcast with the Word Slinger Kevin Tumlinson

Are you interested in getting to know me a little more and gain some insight about Shifted Vision? Listen to the Podcast interview I did with Kevin Tumlinson (AKA the "Word Slinger") 

www.kevintumlinson.com/podcast

WPC-006 - STORY THROUGH TRAGEDY WITH TAMMY MCDONALD

Every life has its tragedies and pain. That’s all part of the story. But you don’t have to let that pain define who you are. It’s part of the story, not the WHOLE story. This week we chat with Tammy McDonald, author of “Shifted Vision: Finding new life in the midst of devastation,” and founder of Shifted Vision Ministries. Learn how to turn around tragedy to make it an empowering part of your story.

As the Holidays creep closer, the sense of dread and anxiety begins to build for people who are facing a different Holiday than ever before. Perhaps it is the first season without a spouse, child, or parent. The longing for "The way things used to be" combined with the growing reminders that "Things will never be the same" can become crippling for some people. 

There is hope. You are not alone. There are tools and plans that you can develop that will help you manage the grief. You can't make it go away because it is a process to go through...not run from. 

I am offering a free grief workshop on managing grief during the Holidays. This workshop is for people who are grieving as well as people who love someone who is grieving. You play a role and can make this season easier on the people buried in grief.

If you can't attend the workshop, but need some coaching, contact me and I will help you make a plan.